Oh my gross

I'm going to preface this post with "I'm sorry, I'm not sorry".

I just read an article online about meat from grocery stores...

You guys.

That shit is DISGUSTING.

Read it here.

I'm not even going to recap it for you because I think everyone should read it for themselves. It's actually a slideshow and won't take long for you to get the point and start dry-heaving. I swore off grocery store meat for the rest of my life after the first slide.

No joke.

Papa Bear and I just decided we're all done with buying meat from the store. It's either raised by his Papa, raised by us or bought locally. Last resort, organic. All done. No thank you.

If you don't have the luxury of farmers markets or are unsure of where they are in your area, the article also provided this handy little link to find local harvest stores.

Yuck.

Seriously, just yuck.

Stompin

If this doesn't get your toe tappin' and your head bobbin, there's no saving you.

Apologies for the abundance of music this week. I'm working on pretty lame projects and it's just about the only thing saving my sanity these days.

I'm not really, really sorry though because it's all good music. So you're welcome.

Now listening: The Faces

"I wish that I knew what I know now, when I was younger"

ain't that the truth?

One by One

Hey guys. It's Thursday. Which means tomorrow is Friday. And you know what comes after Friday.

If I could have one superpower, I would absolutely make the week consist of three work days and four Saturdays. But you'd still get paid the same and Sunday wouldn't come with it's debbie downer attitude of "tomorrow is Monday". How awesome would that be?

Anyway! Remember that one by one campaign by the little red house? Well we're behind, but not by much. 

The first was smile and the second was perform a small act of kindness. The third is to get outside. Fitting, because the weekend is coming and it's summer. Crappy for me because it's supposed to rain. 

But that's neither here nor there.

Get outside. Jump in puddles. Go for a walk. Weed your garden. Take your kid to the park. Go to the beach. Whatever makes you happy and gets you a little dose of Vitamin D. Get out there and do it. Fairly simple. 

Take your camera, snap a pic and then put it away. I'm totally guilty of taking one thousand pictures of "the moment" and not always living it. So that's my double dare, one by one, challenge.

If you have instagram and want to share your outside adventures use #onebyonechallenge. I'll be looking and sharing!

xo

I'm about to blow your mind

And by me, I mean something I found on Pinterest.

If you recall, we have chickens. Some of said chickens are also laying about three eggs a day, so we've got almost three dozen eggs, on average, waiting to be consumed.

How much can you do with eggs, you ask?

Well, lots.

First up. Egg salad.

If you're like me and strongly dislike mayo, this will be right up your alley. Here comes the part where I change your life...substitute avocado for the mayo.

That just happened.

I used about six eggs and one whole avocado but you could totally add more or less of either. Make sure the avocado is pretty ripe. Add some fresh bread, lettuce, salt&peppah and BAM. You have a delish sandy that's not deli meat. Papa Bear and The King totally dig it.

I also swapped out mayo for avocado in the tuna wrap I made Papa Bear last weekend. He said that was good too but he may have been lying to be nice. The verdict is still out on that one.

The avocado is obviously a way, way healthier alternative and none of the texture or taste is sacrificed. It's totally yummy.

Another little diddy I actually made up, that's unbelievably uncomplicated and not creative. I made Papa Bear and Uncle Drew BLT's the other night for dinner. Wait for it...I added avocado and buffalo mayo to the traditional, you guessed it, lettuce, tomato and bacon. The bacon was from their Papa's farm so it wasn't packaged and filled with crap which is awesome. It is so, so good. Plus I buttered and grilled fresh bread from a bakery and added some cheddar.

I followed that up with strawberry shortcake (local strawberries baby) and brownies from a box. Because, I mean, lets be real. They talked about it for a solid hour after they ate. It's totally a man meal.

I'm a culinary wizard and a rockstar. Talk about a homerun.

You're welcome.

I also have plans to try this recipe soon. I need some healthy breakfast that I can take to-go, or even just a healthy snack. I found this on Pinterest too via Gimme Some Oven blog

No-Bake Energy Bites

Prep Time: 10 minutes

10 minutes

Yield: About 3 dozen

These delicious little no bake energy bites are the perfect healthy snack!

Ingredients

• 1 cup (dry) oatmeal (I used old-fashioned oats)
• 2/3 cup toasted coconut flakes
• 1/2 cup peanut butter
• 1/2 cup ground flaxseed or wheat germ
• 1/2 cup chocolate chips (optional)
• 1/3 cup honey or maple syrup
• 1 Tbsp. chia seeds (optional)
• 1 tsp. vanilla extract

Method

Stir all ingredients together in a medium bowl until thoroughly mixed. Let chill in the refrigerator for half an hour. Once chilled, roll into balls of whatever size you would like. (Mine were about 1" in diameter.) Store in an airtight container and keep refrigerated for up to 1 week.

Makes about 20-25 balls.

(c) 2012 Gimme Some Oven. All rights reserved.

Ali’s Tip:

Substitution ideas can abound for just about any of these ingredients! Feel free to substitute in your favorite nut butter (almond butter, sunflower seed butter, etc.) for the peanut butter. And you could also add in some wheat germ in place of some or all of the flaxseed. I would caution, though, against substituting agave nectar for the honey, as the honey’s thickness helps hold things together.

Some other fun substitutions for the chocolate chips (or an addition to them) could include:

• chopped dried fruit (apricots, dates, raisins, etc.)
• dried berries (cranberries, cherries, etc.)
• chopped almonds, pecans, walnuts, or sunflower seeds
• other chips (butterscotch, dark chocolate, milk chocolate, white chocolate, M&Ms, etc.)
• other grains (different kinds of oatmeal, rice cereal, etc.)

Weekendings

Happy Hump Day folks! 

I don't know about you but I start thinking the weekend, first thing Monday morning.

So I'm recapping last weekend in pictures because I can't wait for 3pm on Friday to get here.

We didn't do anything special but it was perfect all the same. We had a solid weekend full of fun. Strawberry picking, painting, playing, building, changing and just hanging. I took a million pictures of Papa Bear and The King. They were pretty much inseparable, which is the cutest. Anything Papa Bear does, The King must also do. I love it. I love them.

Sometimes they drop to the floor and search for things under the couches. It's pretty darn funny.

I was outside checking on the animals when this beauty popped up

Monkey see. Monkey do.

Big boy got a big boy bed.

First night went well. Second and third not so much.

On tap for this weekend - bachelorette party, wedding picnic and relaxationnnnnn

Now listening: Rodney Atkins

Papa Bear and I joked about this song being our future when I was pregnant with The King...

Well now that he's here and we know he's full of piss and vinegar...I'm positive we're going to be singing this song for the rest of our lives. Good thing I like it.

Now listening: Blues Traveler

Such a gem

I'm writing my weekend post in my head and will share it lata. xo

Monday Monday

Nothing like kick starting your week with a trip to the dentist!

I literally got the worlds smallest filling this morning and they gave me so much novocaine my scalp is numb and my heart is racing. 

Maybe I looked like I needed an extra kick in the ass?  

The filling itself took about two minutes but that shot was no joke. He must have shoved that thing into my brain because it hurt so much I had to clench my butt cheeks to make it through.

Sweet mother of pearl.

I gave birth for like, a week, so that's saying something. 

So in case you woke up on the wrong side of the bed, there's your dose of "it could be worse" because we all know that always makes everything better...

Cheers to a bad case of the Mondays, my friends!

Now listening: Rolling Stones

Thank you sweet baby Jesus for Fridays and the weekend.

I love this jam.

Taking a break

I'm doing so much work in excel today that I think my eyes may start to bleed.

Sounds enjoyable, right?

I found out yesterday that I suck at my job.

I'm only slightly exaggerating. 

I don't suck at all of it, just the data analytics part. And what I mean by data analytics is copying and pasting 8,000 different cells into different workbooks. Something a third grader could do. You try doing that for 8 hours straight and tell me you don't make a mistake. 

I'd call bullshit.

I've never had to take such blunt criticism like that at work before so I was all sorts of weird. I owned it, of course, and apologized. I was pretty disappointed because it was true, I made some mistakes that were pretty damn stupid.

The best part is that normally I would dwell on something like that, and I almost did but then I didn't. I'm not saving babies and I'm certainly not finding the cure for cancer. Nothing catastrophic happened as a result of my messing up a formula in excel.

And also, I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.

Fuck is the appropriate word there, sorry.

So they can suck a D, take this excel nonsense and send it right over to India like everyone else who has mind numbing work to be done. I care zero.

This has totally become just a job which is unfortunate because I've worked really hard to make a name for myself. But I guess that's life. I got bigger fish to fry now and let me tell you what, it feels pretty damn good to honestly be able to say that after a few solid months of being pissed right off about the whole situation.

I don't know what the point of this post was, other than to bitch? Tell you people I messed something up? We're all human? We all make mistakes. Get over it?

I don't know. I guess I had to get that off my chest. I feel much better now. Thanks.

Here's some good tunes.

Back to work. 

Wicked cool fabric

I have lots of pipe dreams.

Which is not the result of smoking anything out of a pipe.

I just thought I should clarify that.

But I think a pipe dream is a real thing, like, from smoking things you shouldn't smoke out of pipes. It's just not a real thing for me.

To each his own.

You probably weren't even thinking any of that and now I'm all off topic.

The pipe dreams.

I was day dreaming about making The King some rad leggings a few weeks ago and sought out to find a fabric company that I could make my own or order some cool stretchy fabric.

I dabbled in constructing some leggings a long while back and it was wicked easy. Maybe not so much wicked pretty or wicked neat or an actual size that The King could wear. But that's neither here, nor there.

Psh. Of course, I can make clothes. I can do anything.

Ha.

Only problem. I have no time, no sewing machine (I borrowed my ma's last time) and no clue how to sew a button.

Who am I kidding?

Probably the person smoking the pipe...

Anyway!

All of that to say I have a wicked awesome website to share with you! Just in case you have pipe dreams and actual talent...and are still reading.

Spoonflower is ridiculous. There are so many damn options and such cool designers. You can follow them and like their stuff and order whatever you like, in whatever kind of fabric you need. And while I like to think that I like variety and options, I don't. I'm not good at making decisions. But I still recommend the site.

You're welcome.

Now listening: Red Hot Chili Pepers

Feeling a little unmotivated and discouraged this morning. I've been a little distracted with personal stuff and my work stuff is sucking. Totally not like me.

Plus my motherfreaking teeth hurt. Since when did it hurt to get your teeth cleaned? Sweet mother of pearl.

I need an iced coffee and a breakfast sandwich stat.

Let's do this.

Happy hump day.

Now listening: Kacey Musgraves

Kacey Musgraves' album is one of the six or so I've picked up in the last month...

Hi. My name is Jen and I'm a country music buying addict.

(applause, fist pumps)

I'm undecided as to whether or not I like it but this song stuck out to me.

I really like this one too

Somebunny's gettin ooooooold...

Be sure to wish Papa Bear a happy 30th birthday today!!

xoxo

Down on the farm

Y'all

We had an awesome, awesome weekend. 

Friday night, Papa Bear took me out to dinner and drinks with a side of karaoke. We ate too much, drank a few adult beverages and I sang my best rendition of "Love Shack" yet. We ended the night by 10:30 and really had so much fun.

It's kind of funny to reflect on what "fun" used to be and think of how utterly insane we all once were. Guess that's growing up, right?

Saturday we ventured to an "animal fair" that Papa Bear found on Craigslist. It wasn't so much an animal fair, as it was a crazy lady trying to downsize her unruly farm. Fine by me, we acquired two new animals. Two bunnies by the names of Peanut Butter and Fluff. I almost went home with a goat but we couldn't get him home in the jeep.

Papa Bear is lucky.

Shout out to CM for the stellar names!

Then we went home, built a safe place for our new pets, expanded the chicken pen and acquired three older hens; Ginger, Sheryl and Ruthie. Papa Bear did this on a whim, I think because Grace killed my favorite hen last week. Yes, she's still messing with me.

Anyway, we officially have a return on our investment, which wasn't necessarily a smart one but hey, it's fun and we know where our food is from. People, we now have eggs to collect!

We let The King play in the rain and mud. We weeded the gardens and blueberry bushes a bit. Ended the day with a hot shower, poison ivy and a fresh batch of those ridiculous sea salt chocolate chip cookies.

Heavenly.

Sunday was cleaning and errands day but warm enough to play outside a bit. It's so fun to watch The King play with all of the animals. And by play, I mean he tries to squeeze the bunnies, rubs his face on their fur and yells at the chickens. We're learning to be gentle but it's a slow process. Besides it's entertaining for everyone involved.

Papa Bear and I have officially been bitten by the animal/farm bug. We had a few conversations this weekend that started with "so what animals can we get next?" and "next year we should set the garden's up this way..." and "we need a little barn out back"...

We may be spiraling out of control.

Here's some pics. You know I took a few hundred.

My outfit is featured in this months edition of Vogue.

He loves soft stuff. Who doesn't?

 

Trading kisses for ice cream. I don't approve of the ice cream but they're cute

This may seem unsafe but he sits completely still and gobbles up fruit while he watches me cook breakfast.
I guess it's our fun little  "thing" we have.

Not so sure.

Summer. Yes.

This is probably not as fun as I think it is...

If anyone has any idea how to clean eggs, or knows whether we should, please let me know!!

Happy monday people!

Now listening: Joe Diffie

Yep, Joe Diffie.

He was on the radio this morning promoting his new single. I listened to it briefly in iTunes yesterday and I can tell you right now, I will not be buying it. It's all sorts of rap weird. I don't even know. It felt all wrong.

Anyway, bravo to his team for striking while the iron is hot. He should probably send an edible arrangement to Jason Aldean.

I do, however, very much enjoy this jam.

And this one.

A synopsis

Well. I'm not so sure you'll want a recap but it seems like a good way to kick off writing again. It's been crazy. So here's the happenings and why I had to take a break.

Traveling. Like, way too much.
Homesteading, if I can even call it that, keeps you busy.
Back to working full-time. Dealing with serious mama guilt and weekends that feel too short.
The end of an era - we said goodbye to old faithful, the one and only, Lou dog
The King has been battling ear infections, fevers and illness. Non-freakin-stop.
First birthday
We got tubes for his ears which worked well for the weekend. We're back to miserable.
More ruined shoes.
Partay for The King. It was too big.
I have an uncanny ability to break things.
I found a chicken in my kitchen last night. It was dead and not from the grocery store. Grace was so proud.
Life. Just lots of life.

So I think that's everything. It seems like a run of bad luck, mixed with still freezing temperatures which is just plain annoying and a bad attitude. With the start of June, I'm feeling like I closed the chapter on that hell of a month and am moving forward.

Thank you sweet baby Jesus.

I am having a bit of a hard time finding time for myself lately which I need to work on. It seems like every hour of my day is consumed with taking care of The King, Papa Bear, chores or work. The 5am wake up idea worked for about a week and then The King decided he would no longer sleep past 5:30. Which is just absurd.

If we can get The King's health together and get him on a normal schedule, I think things will start to fall into place again. Summer certainly isn't going to wait for us and I have a laundry list of things that need to get done!

I need lists and goals. I'm totally one of those people.

Here you are.

Start running again. For real.
Concerts
Coffee
Food festivals
Wedding
Maybe real life wedding planning. Ha.
BBQs
Ice cream cones - froyo for The King, duh
Friends
Maybe some camping
Fishing
Papa Bear
Read books. I miss it.
Canning. I'm scared.

What's on your agenda?

That felt good. Thanks to JAM for hounding me to get back on the horse.

Now listening: Adele

Adele is magic. There's pretty much nothing more I can say.

One more

This one is a little different but it's good. It's toe tappin for sure

Thomas Rhett - Make Me Wanna

Now listening: So much my head is exploding

Hey

I'm baaaaaaaack

There is so much good music out right now. I don't even know what to do with myself. Here are my faves. Listen to all of them.

Thomas Rhett - It Goes Like This

George Strait - Love is Everything

Pistol Annies - Damn Thing

Billy Currington - Hey Girl

Chris Young - Aw Naw