Big Hot Mess

Sometimes, scratch that, most times, crazy things happen to me in the morning.

I can't explain it.

1. I was up all night with a kid who apparently will not just breathe through his freaking mouth and prefers to stay up and whine because his nose is mysteriously plugged. Seriously, I can't explain it.
2. I stepped on approximately 3,000 cars, plastic dinosaurs and a hammer before 7:30am
3. I found Kingy's sneaker in the dog's water bowl. Weird. I didn't leave it there.
4. I also found a drawer missing from a cabinet in the mud room and a dinosaur costume in a dog bed.
5. One dog, terrified of my howling and cussing (lets be real), snuck into the house and peed all over the floor. I felt bad for him but more so for me because the cleaners just made that floor sparkly clean.
6. Kingy spilled his entire breakfast on the floor, twice. Then proceeded to drag a stool around the kitchen to get into the fridge and cupboards in search of cheese and cookies.
7. I may or may not have smashed my elbow after throwing one of my chewed shoes at Baboo. That'd be karma, I suppose.
8. My face is a hot mess. I don't know what's going on. We're talking swollen itchy eyes and pimples. I'm like a 13 year old.
9. I have no makeup on today and my hair is piled on top of my head. I'm taking business casual to a whole new level.
10.  I don't have anything for 10, thank you sweet baby Jesus, but I like even numbers so I made a bullet. Deal.

In other news, I picked up Eric Church's new album yesterday and people, it is SO good. It's not mainstream country at all which is so refreshing. In fact, it's a little weird at times. I mean, did you see his Outsiders performance? But I'd say it's more so modern southern rock. I think? Is that a thing? It's a lot of guitars and a lot of rocking and some funk. I love it.

No joke, I danced my way down the sidewalk and into the building this morning jamming to "That's Damn Rock and Roll". I may or may not have also danced in the elevator.

Tomorrow is FRIDAY! YAY!!!!!